who dat? contest.
(yo stee. i know
mark addy. actor.
first correct answer:
left column sad
So it looks like an unforeseen piece of fallout from the big break-up might be landing at my doorstep today as a matter of fact: I think I'm inheriting a cat.
What do I do? What do I say to it? How is my life going to change? I'm not sure I can handle many more life changes right now. A late horrible shock is that my boss/friend/protector here at work just told us he's leaving. I can scarce deal.
"Uh. Hey cat. Uh... how's it going?"
"Hey cat. Go get me a beer."
"Cat. You wanna play Scrabble? I'll let you cheat. You can spell sounds you make. Like Meh. Roaw. Prrrrrr. You wanna?"
"Hey cat. Fetch. No? You wanna take a walk?"
"I made you something special for dinner. Just kidding, it's a bowl of dry brown crap again. Hee. You don't think that's funny? Sorry."
"Uh. Are you happy? Are you sad? You wanna talk about your day? No?"
"Because I'd love to talk about mine. So, things have been very strange around my neck of the woods lately. Check this shit out: so..."
(TWO HOURS LATER)
"...so there's that. How fucked is that shit? Seriously, what do I do? Please. I could use the advice? Hey cat? You're sleeping aren't you? Damn."
So listen: if this journal becomes all about The Cat, please shoot me. Or it. Your choice.
Lord, help me.
She'll only come out at night. The lean and hungry type. Nothing is new, I've seen her here before. Watching and waiting. Ooh, she's sittin' with you but her eyes are on the door. So many have paid to see. What you think you're gettin' for free. The woman is wild, a she-cat tamed by the purr of a Jaguar. Money's the matter. If you're in it for love, you ain't gonna get too far. (Oh-oh, here she comes) Watch out boy she'll chew you up. (Oh-oh, here she comes) She's a maneater. (Oh-oh, here she comes) Watch out boy she'll chew you up. (Oh-oh, here she comes) She's a maneater... speaking of which. Dude. I love cats. When they knead on your lap and it makes you feel funny down there... What?
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