who dat? contest.
none today either
So just yesterday I was talking about ODB and how he showed up and performed at the NYC Wu Tang show, before taking off in order to continue eluding cops. (Think about it: he escaped from a drug rehab center in Pasadena, if I remember correctly. How the fuck did ODB get all the way across the country? Seriously? How "under" could he possibly ever be?) Anyway, he was busted yesterday eating food in his car outside a Philly-area McDonalds. A female cop who listens to the Wu recognized him. ODB is for the children.
So let's look at some more of the MTV Top 100 Greatest Pop Songs...
74 TINY DANCER Elton John. I'll tell you what made me like this song again: Almost Famous, the movie. It's a great scene and I'd never really given Tiny Dancer much thought. I know Elton's songs and like him, but don't own any albums or anything. I like other of his songs better (I think I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues is one of my favorite songs ever) but I can live with Tiny Dancer here.
73 DO YOU REALLY WANT TO HURT ME Culture Club. Yes, I do. Eh. It's campy and fun, but is it really a good song? C'mon. Think about it hard. Hm... OK, fine! Stubborn bastards.
72 FREE FALLIN' Tom Petty. Now, this hurts. I am listening to Full Moon Fever as I type. This song is just so goddamn good. "I wanna glide down, over Mullholland. I wanna write her name in the sky. I wanna free fall, out into nothing. I want to leave this world for a while." Seriously. Go listen to it again and tell me it ain't better than fucking MmmBop?
71 I WANNA BE SEDATED The Ramones. Hate this song for one reason: my downstairs neighbor of the last 5 years played it constantly at a volume of 11. "Twenty-Twenty-Twenty four hours to go-o-o." Oh how that made me shake with fury. But. At my friend's wedding recently, we were dancing and the DJ (why are all wedding DJ's just about the chessiest people on the planet?) played this song and I found myself groovin' hard. Yes, I was drunk and the vibes were all good that night, but still. I think it might be an OK song. Speaking of good vibes...
70 GOOD VIBRATIONS The Beach Boys. Is this the best Beach Boys song? Didn't Pet Sounds inspire Sgt. Pepper's. OK, maybe they have higher songs, as I haven't looked at the whole list on purpose. But. I can think of much better BB songs. Wouldn't It Be Nice for one. Think about it. I mean, seriously. That would be about number 20 for me. Sloop John B. Even Caroline No.
69 JUST CAN'T GET ENOUGH Depeche Mode. Is this really a Depeche Mode song? Now, I know very little about "The Mode" and don't consider myself a fan, but isn't this song sort of an uptempo anomaly for them? Yeah, fuck this song. I'm sure there are better Depeche Mode songs if you, like, have to have a DM song on here. I'd rather a Cure or Morrissey song myself, but I can live without all three.
68 ONLY HAPPY WHEN IT RAINS Garbage. I like Stupid Girl better. Shirley Manson has been forever poisoned for me by tales of her bitchiness in Madison, where they record. But. She can sing. The band is tight. And she is a hot little piece of ass. (Sorry, but she is.)
67 MY NAME IS Eminem. I don't understand what MTV is doing with the rap. We have, like, OPP and a mellow LL song and this. I just... I can't. I can't even get into the ramifications of all the rap they're leaving out then. I mean, where are the Beastie Boys, yo? I don't know. I can't touch it. This is, however, a good song and I've talked before of my appreciation for his skills.
66 TIME AFTER TIME Cyndi Lauper. Love this song. You have to. Really. This is a very good song, and while she certainly has other great songs off this album, I have no problem with Time After Time. Shit, I was 12 once too. But I like She Bop because it's about girls masturbating. Rock.
65 JUST WHAT I NEEDED The Cars. Eh.
64 BENNIE AND THE JETS Elton John. Yeah. Again. I never really connected to this song of his. I mean, Sacrifice? Or Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me? Really.
63 MMMBOP Hanson. Shut up. You shut the fuck up right now.
62 PAPA DON'T PREACH Madonna. No. No! Not even in the Top 10 of Madonna songs. Oh, I'm becoming bitter, y'all.
61 THE ONE I LOVE R.E.M. Yes. Yes. Great song. Great song. I like Fall On Me better, in this old R.E.M. genre, but this is a damn fine song. And, this now makes four favorites in a row of gay men everywhere!
60 JUST THE WAY YOU ARE Billy Joel. Oh, man. Billy Joel is just a conundrum I can't quite get into here. There are so many good songs and yet he just continues to disappoint with his, presence these days. He should have died 10 years ago. Cruel, I know. But, c'mon. It's true. Anyway, this is a fine song and quite lovely, though I heard a rumor that this was written for his first ex wife and thus, he hates it now. I don't, however, like the line about not wanting clever conversation and he never wanted to work that hard. Really, I can't understand what exactly Billy wants from his women, and I'm not sure I like it if I do.
59 YOU ARE THE SUNSHINE OF MY LIFE Stevie Wonder. Yes. Lovely song.
58 ONE HEADLIGHT The Wallflowers. No. Again, you shut the fuck up right now. So many better candidates. One Slot taken away.
57 OUR LIPS ARE SEALED The Go-Go's. Awesome song. Really. Genius, nearly. Just happy and beautiful and fun. Love me some Go-Go's.
56 I WILL SURVIVE Gloria Gaynor. Is there a gayer song? Don't get me wrong, it's fantastic, but really. Is there?
55 BYE, BYE, BYE *NSYNC. I had a request from a friend to point out that this song should be where the Backstreet song is (Number 10, I hear) and vice versa. I have no feeling about this asteriks-in-their-name having band.
54 UNDER THE BRIDGE Red Hot Chili Peppers. Great song. Not the best Chili Peppers song.
53 FAITH George Michael. You've got to have it. I like I Want Your Sex, more, though. But Faith rules. Limp Bizkit's reworking was a travesty.
52 MAYBE I'M AMAZED Paul McCartney/Wings. Yeah, I really don't condone Paul McCartney post Beatles. But. This is truly a great song. Go, you Angela Lansbury-looking motherfucker.
51 JUST MY IMAGINATION The Temptations. Sure. Whatever. I don't know why the Temptations can be here but a host of other bands cannot. Fine. Good song. I can name 10 other Motown songs more deserving though.
What do you think about this 100 Greatest Pop Songs list?
Once upon a time in the Land of Fever there lived a scarlet pussy. This kitty cat of fine descent was cherished by her mother who wouldn't let another pet her. Unless he was qualified. Every first of the month this pretty feline got the hots. And that's when the neighborhood d-d-dogs, they'd line up around the block. Meow! When my little scarlet feline roars the locals come around. (Come around.) When they see the scarlet light they know it's time 2 come chase her down. (Chase her down.) Lo and behold - the fantastical way in which their bodies groove. My Scarlet Pussy's furry magic alters any mood. (Scarlet Pussy, hey.) It's cool. (Scarlet Pussy, yeah.) Ahh, pussycat, pussycat - wherefore art thou, puppy? She can make U crazy if U're 2 close 2 her heat. She can make U sad when U're happy as can be. She can make U shoot your ego all over her sheets. All is hers in love and war, my little Scarlet Pussy... speaking of which. Hey, this isn't my bed.
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