who dat? contest.
(yo stee. i know
film director mimi leder
first correct answer:
The reports of the couple's reconciliation have been greatly exaggerated. Yeah, they're splitting for sure. Who cares, right? Well, yes, on one hand, who cares. But on the other hand, any break-up, even the break-up of a totally fake beard-marriage (I'm kidding) is sad. The death of love is never good.
But here's a question: can love work in Hollywood. And of course I don't just mean in Hollywood the city, but in the entertainment industry. In the arts. Can it work? The divorce rate among celebrities seems to be higher, but who knows if it is actually any different from the rest of society. And even so, for every Bruce and Demi there seems to be a... shit, I don't know. Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward. I guess that's sort of true: when one person is famous and one isn't, it's fine. Not always - many stars seem to eventually get rid of their spouses; they trade up as it were - but I think these relationships have a better chance at survival. And there are instances of marriages working out between two stars when one's career is going markedly better than the other's. Think Mark Harmon and Pam Dawber. Michael J. Fox and Tracey Pollan. Steve Kametko and Greg Louganis.
Actors, performers in general, are very needy people. We usually get into this business because have learned to get and therefore need constant approval we maybe didn't get somewhere else. There are exceptions to this of course, but generally we're sluts for the applause. We live and die by the audience, by the critics, by people being attracted to us, drawn to us because we're entertaining and funny and compelling and intense and can drink hard and party hard and command a room - and still show up for rehearsal the next morning at 11. I'm not advocating this - I think it's rather sad in many ways - but it is what it is. Love for art, all that, it's true - but usually even more so it is the need for love. Tim O'Brien, a very intelligent writer of mostly fiction about Vietnam, once said in an Op-Ed piece in the New York Times that he went to Vietnam for love. The love of his country, the love of his parents, the love of the women he knew. He went to kill people, (and I believe he actually did), for the same love that, certainly in part, draws me to spend 20 hours a week in rehearsals for a show I'm going to do a total of two times for no money in front of maybe 100 people. It's the same reason I do this space, why I watch horrible television for little money, why I'm into three way action , why I write screenplays, why I make movies. It's not why I play the piano or love dogs or watch baseball - those things I do purely for my own personal pleasure. (And those things are hard to find time to do in the face of, well, the possibility of money or yes, love coming in.)
And the reason I bring this up is because, having experienced it, I think it's very very hard for two performers to be together in Hollywood. Especially two not-yet-successful performers. When you have two forces in need of the same thing - feelings are going to come up, no matter how much you love the person. But then I find artists to be the most interesting and stimulating people (I do, I'm sorry - I'm a whore for the talent), if impossible to be with. I don't think it's impossible, I just think it can be very very hard. If I had a choice, I would date a violinist with the Los Angeles Philharmonic. That's my ideal girlfriend. Or a vet who sings in a rock band on the side. That would be cool too. But I can almost guarantee you I'll end up dating another actress. Aside from the difficulty of two similarly needy people both trying to get what they have to get - there are indeed benefits. They know what you do. They understand. They can help you. They can run lines with you and rehearse you for an audition. You can test bits out on them - just because they love you doesn't mean they won't tell you if something's not funny. You excite each other with plans. You have a sounding board for ideas. They read your scripts and break them down better than anyone else. They have similar fears and concerns. They are your business partner in a sense. I admired M's acting more than almost anyone I've ever met. Her talent awed me. And it was a lovely feeling. In a week I'm going to be seeing her in a show for the first time where I haven't been there through any of it. From auditions to first reading to rehearsals to tech. I knew nothing about the process. I used to marvel over her process, read her research where she'd let me. And now I'll not have that benefit. I'm sure it's not going to be easy, but she's good enough that at a point I know I'm going to forget that I'm watching her up there, and I'm going to slip into the play and see only character. Not realize I'd been thinking of her as "Lulu" or "Lady Macbeth" or "Masha" until the lights dim, the curtain falls, and she emerges to take a bow. Then I'll realize I'd forgotten absolutely.
And that's when the struggle of dating a fellow performer pays off. In those moments it is worth all of that. And all of this. To be close enough to feel the same fire burning inside them that burns inside you. That's when it's more than worth it.
Lastly. A friend sent me this. L.A. people pay attention. He's trying very hard to do a good thing here. It's a hard situation:
..."Know anyone who might want a really cute dog? I am putting out an all-points. I was walking tonight and saw a dog get hit by a car -- it was very traumatic. The dog managed to scramble to side of the road while I stopped traffic, and I stood with it to keep it out of the road -- which, fortunately, it had no interest in after that -- until the shelter people arrived. When I called they said that it should be okay -- probably a hip fracture -- which is crazy, considering what it went through. It's a small, beautiful, neutered, tan Pomeranian mix. It has until Sep 5th (Tues) for the owner to claim it or to be adopted. If you know anyone, have them call me and I'll give them the info."
He's arranged to adopt the dog and then for a rescue group to take it away from the pound. He loves this poor little dog, but his roommates are allergic. Just let me know if you know of anyone who is interested. Thank you.
Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone. Suzanne the plans they made put an end to you. I walked out this mornin' and I wrote down this song. I just can't remember who to send it to. I've seen fire and I've seen rain. I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end. I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend. But I always thought that I'd see you again. Won't you like down upon me Jesus. You gotta help me make a stand. You just got to see me through another day. My body's achin' and my time is at hand. I won't make it any other way. I've seen fire and I've seen rain. I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end. I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend. But I always thought that I'd see you again. Been walkin' my mind to an easy time. My back turned towards the sun. Lord knows when the cold wind blows it'll turn your head around. Well there's hours of time on the telephone line to talk about things to come. Sweet dreams and fine machines in pieces on the ground. Oh I've seen fire and I've seen rain. I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end. I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend. But I always thought that I'd see you baby, one more time again. Thought I'd see you one more time again. There's just a few things comin' my way this time around. Thought I'd see, thought I'd see you... speaking of which. Hey y'lals. I saaw rain the other night on the TV. I was twatwching a thing called... what was thatd amn thing cllld/? Hard Rian or somethihng. Oh damn, i'm fuckedup y='la*l. Whosooo. We're my son? Hey, lil' fucker! Wher arew you?! Damn .I need s adrink. I do. I doi. Fucki y'alll. fer reall.
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