never been a bitch so I don't act bitchy

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

New Film Pigs Alternate DVD Commentary -- The Reaping!

Having secured the coveted early spring release window, one would have thought 2007's The Reaping would have become an instant classic. I mean, you've got a gritty biblical horror starring Academy-award winning actress Hilary Swank who last wowed audiences in 2004's "The Bourne Supremacy" - what could go wrong? One thing is for sure: if you travel to a small southern town to debunk biblical plagues, stay away from the mumbly Liam Neeson-Elvis guy and all small blonde girls who are probably possessed by the devil. Or just have really bad ADD or something. What hath God wrought? Boredom. Happy Halloween!

So head over to Film Pigs Dot Com to download the end of the world.

We can also be podcast from iTunes. Search under "Comedy" to subscribe.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

More Cowbell


Thursday, October 25, 2007

Nikki Finke Puts The Fire In Perspective

While I have to admit enjoying Nikki Finke's coverage of the strike-related rattling of old-timey weapons, I still think she's paranoid and weird and oddly-prudish (as well as always complaining of being either ill or having trouble with her cable company).

But I give her credit for being, well, not level-headed, but at least heathily skeptical about Hollywood culture. Which is why I can't for the life of me understand her latest piece, which is a wrap-up of the important news in all this fire coverage: how it has affected the rich and famous. One would think she's taking the piss, but I can't find the jokes.

The best image: "Entertainment litigator Bert Fields took turns with his housekeeper hosing down his roof while his wife prayed."

Man, I really hope that woman got overtime.

Read it here. Prepared to be meh-ed away.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Film Pigs Own The Night

The Film Pigs cannot, I repeat, cannot get enough of gritty cop thrillers where famous Academy-recognized actors are pitted against each other with a violent backdrop, and finally come head to head in scenes of either indulgent overacting or mind-numbingly boring, mumbling underacting. In We Own The Night, you get both!

And then go check out our newly-gussied-up website. Skelton is a fancy man.

Sunday, October 14, 2007


Wednesday, October 10, 2007



Tuesday, October 02, 2007

New Film Pigs Alternate DVD Commentary -- Torque!

Combining the subtle nuances of "The Fast And The Furious" with the drum-tight structure of "Timerider", Torque feels much longer than it's running time of 84 minutes. Some people might consider that quality filmmaking - others might use it to interrorgate enemy combatants in secret prisons. Either way, Torque's timeless message is clear: motorcycles are, like, cool and stuff! Radical!

So watch out for that muffler to the face and head over to Film Pigs dot com to download the latest commentary.

We can also be podcast from iTunes. Search under "Comedy" to subscribe.